From Self-Improvement to Self-Unfoldment

A Paradigm Shift

Many people come to coaching, like therapy or even fitness, because they have a sense that they would like to ‘improve’ themselves.  While the pursuit of growth is natural and healthy, there is often an unnoticed underlying belief behind the drive to self-improve: I am deficient as I am now.  This basis of viewing ourselves as incomplete or not-yet-whole becomes a subtle reinforcer of the feeling of deficiency that is driving the whole project of self-improvement.

In my coaching, we approach this work from a basis of wholeness.  The truth is, you are already complete and whole as you are.  We are not deficient, yet there may be old patterns of emotional reactivity and behavior that were developed early on in life that are no longer serving us.  Rather than demonizing these reactive patterns and approaching them with a change agenda, we seek simply to deepen our own Self-contact in such a way that we begin to see the inherent goodness and intelligence of each part of ourselves.  This is a radically different approach than the traditional self-help motivation, yet as we strengthen our capacity to be with what arises in us with a gentle, nonjudgmental presence, we may be surprised at what unfolds.

The Self-Unfoldment paradigm holds that the wisdom, creativity and resources we need to navigate the complexities of our life are already within us.  Within the coaching container, we develop our ability to meet whatever arises with curiosity, kindness and openness - what Unfolds from there emerges from the deepening contact with the Depths of our own Being.